News:

Welcome to V.L.H

Main Menu
Welcome to verylittlehelps. Please login or sign up.

12-08-22, 09:38AM

Login with username, password and session length
Members
  • Total Members: 5,571
  • Latest: Monty
Stats
  • Total Posts: 30,251
  • Total Topics: 551
  • Online today: 51
  • Online ever: 660
  • (06-06-21, 01:57AM)
Users Online
Users: 3
Guests: 44
Total: 47

Manipulation tactics

Started by ihavequestions23, 21-06-22, 07:40AM

Previous topic - Next topic

ihavequestions23

I really don't want to say much because people (including myself) can get into trouble. I'm the type of person who just wants to work and get on with my job and go home, without politics and bureaucracy and manipulation but there we are.

The scenario is some people are being disciplined.  I was told by one person I was not to be disciplined, another person then told me I was. I accepted it. Then the first person told me to ignore that and that I am not being disciplined, but to tell my other colleagues that I was being disciplined so that they don't get annoyed. I refused to lie to my colleagues and said I either get disciplined, or I don't, but I won't lie and say I have been if I haven't. I am now, once again, having a disciplinary.

There were some emotional manipulation tactics going on and I chose to ignore them to keep the peace. I will be keeping this to myself, also to keep the peace. I just want to work, go home, and have peace. I hate all this underhandedness and I hate the feeling that the whole store is run on secrecy and lies and unequal treatment. I know so much about what is going on behind the scenes and I just let it go and get on with it, but lately it's really hard to ignore. Everything is so toxic and spiteful at the moment and I feel so anxious and uneasy about it all.

Why can't workers be disciplined for whatever, and move on. Why does everything have to be covered up with lie after lie. Why can't managers agree and why are others so scared to stand up to their superiors, or confront the staff doing the wrongdoings? Everything is so backwards.

NightAndDay

Judges need to start beating Tesco managers with the employment law stick.

Sherwoodforest

There is a protector line you can ring if you feel like that,should be a poster in store

Jackwarda

@ihavequestions23   - Well, that reads a lot. IF it was me, maybe others as well; but I would not want to be disciplined if I hadnt done anything wrong. I would question it with the manager who is disciplining! Also seek advice maybe from UNION. If I was asked to lie! I would refuse and ask that it be noted in a document that you asked me to lie?
There is protector line - i have never used it.
Ignore people rumouring and saying this and saying that?
You are there for working, try to do your best, certainly dont get involved in the work politics spouted by some staff that dont have the facts.
Maybe some one on here could help you more

lackofinterest

do as you want. go in do your job, speak to no managers unless you have to reply to one,then only if you want to. then go home.....on time!!!! my basic rules!!

ihavequestions23

@ihavequestions23   - Well, that reads a lot. IF it was me, maybe others as well; but I would not want to be disciplined if I hadnt done anything wrong. I would question it with the manager who is disciplining! Also seek advice maybe from UNION. If I was asked to lie! I would refuse and ask that it be noted in a document that you asked me to lie?
There is protector line - i have never used it.
Ignore people rumouring and saying this and saying that?
You are there for working, try to do your best, certainly dont get involved in the work politics spouted by some staff that dont have the facts.
Maybe some one on here could help you more
[/quote]

I did refuse, I agree I think really this shouldn't have happened and I shouldn't have been put in that situation. I also shouldn't be getting disciplined just because they are concerned about what others might think, but I accept the decision, rather that then lie to my co-workers and live with the guilt. It would all come out anyway and I'd be the one in the line of fire. I could speak up but it will just become a whole new fight and I'm done fighting, I just want to get this out of the way and continue doing my job, which I have always done. Plus more!

But thankyou, I'll keep it in consideration in case things escalate but for now I think it's best to move on.

lucgeo

I think your post is more about letting off steam regarding  your frustrations working at your store!

It's not healthy for anyone when you have immature and ill trained managers who who play the 'divide and conquer' strategy to lead a team!

Anyone being disciplined, for whatever reason, does not, and should not feel compelled to discuss anything with other colleagues. Any manager who tells you to falsely inform others as to your personal outcome, should be questioned WHY???

You'll have managers who constantly state "the SM said this, told me to tell you, wants you to do " as though it's out of their hands and they're just following orders  :-X

We used to have a team manager who always used this strategy until their bluff was called! You have a right to a voice, a quick innocent query to  the SM as to why they've given these instructions usually results in the senior manager's outright denial, as they've either not given the instructions or they have, but know they're against policy and don't want to be caught out!

Write down times, dates, what was said by whom and people present. Keep them for future reference, even going as far as to write them down openly in front of the person, stating your just keeping it for your own future reference  ;)
Live for today. Learn from yesterday.

ihavequestions23

#7
Admin:
Please do not quote immediately prior post(s).


You're right, my post was mainly to vent! I have been feeling extremely anxious whilst all this has been going on, because I've had colleagues questioning me, management giving me different instructions, been asked to lie, been lied to etc. Then being told "confidential" to try and stop me saying things, when I wouldn't have anyway but I hate being manipulated and lied to so it's been a struggle not blurting it all out because it's frustrated me. My mental health was fine for ages until all this started, and not being able to talk to anyone made it worse. I'll be fine once it's all over.

But I have kept note. I keep note of all the things that happen when I see they're not within policy or when there's been lies etc. I keep things for my own reference, I've always done that in other jobs too. Good idea. Thanks for replying.

Jackwarda

I quite agree. Keep a diary, note everything in it, who, what, why, when. When I first started someone told me to do this. I did. I have over ten years of work diarys, where i recorded things. Believe me it comes in useful down the line1

SMF spam blocked by CleanTalk